Off to Latvia...........

Dear Friends and Family,

wer'e off to Latvia for two weeks to visit relatives for the first time. will be back and share pictures of our trip in two weeks. Bye!!!!

6/9/07 MY THIRD CHILD

My last little bundle of joy. She was my angel baby. She came at a time in my life when I was slowly changing. Older maybe.My marriage still was not good but I as many people I felt she would change things.. She was such a beautiful child and slept all night thru right off.. Before she came into this world I craved pizza, raspberries and apple juice.

She was a happy baby. She laughed and smiled most of the time. She was easy care. She loved to play with Tupperware and canned goods. I could see in her eyes she would be very special someday.Her name is Mica. Many of you have looked at her blog or are very familiar with her art. If you haven't please click on the link and check it out. http://garboodles.typepad.com/
I know that she always has had a angel looking over her. Even through her rough spots she was not forsaken. God sent many messengers to help her and brush her off and set her on a better path.

She has a beautiful giving warm heart. She calls me almost everyday if possible and we talk for hours. When she was in grade school she loved Elvis. Do not know why but she told me Elvis was her husband. When I kissed her goodnight I had to kiss Elvis too. Quite an imagination. Her teen years were tough but look at the mess I was in and the children suffered. Beginning relationships were abusive too. I prayed for for her that she would survive our life and her teenage years.

Then she found a wonderful guy Tony. He has given her the love she needs and has provided her with a home and they share their two children( Vincente and Abriana) They both have a strong belief in God and have raised the children that way as well. She home schools both kids, finds time to cart them to their outings and finds great satisfaction in that and her love of art.

I wonder sometimes where she got it but they say creativity is in the blood line. She has instilled a strong family bond in the children and I am thankful for that. I wish everyday that my children will remain close . She used to tell me--Mommy I will always live with you and daddy. I am never going to move away. Now she lives the farthest. I go once a year for a visit. My husband Tim likes to take a few days to visit all by himself so he goes alone.
Mica you have made me so proud of you. I still see the cute plump wide eyed curly headed little girl. You are blessed and you are loved. I miss your companionship.


POEM: Angel

God gave me a little angel and it is you
He gave me no instructions what I was suppose to do

Yours eyes they sparkled like a little star
I knew right then that you would go far

You always sat behind my legs and I played with your hair
You always gave me lots of hugs and I was glad that you were there

I cradle all the memories deep with in my heart
But I am sad at times that we are so far apart

I love you my angel now and forever
I will never be far and will leave you never


I Love you Mica....

6/6/07 My Second Child

My son. Well what can I say. He is a wonderful human being. He is smart, handsome and has a beautiful wife and family. He is always serious and thinks about things along time before making a decision.

He has had the same personality even when he was born. I was not sick much during the 9 months. I craved tacos and cold turkey sandwiches. The delivery was easy. I call him my 4 hour baby. He did not smile much and was always hungry. As a parent you look at the little faces and cooo and giggle at them and sometimes they smile or giggle back but not my son. He would lower his brow and just stare at me. Just as if to say. Is that all or are you done yet?
He had a little horse with wheels and he loved it. I think that was the only times his face lit up. He laughed out loud. He would repeat. Loopa loopa horsey. The wheels literally wore off the horse. I am sure that growing up between two sisters was tough too.



Remember the Tonka trucks? Well, the ad used to say they were indestructible. Well my Son TY knew how to dent, bend and remove wheels. Every time we bought a toy he took it apart just to see how it operated. That is probably why he enjoys technical work. He was such a smart child. He was very gifted and was in the Gate program. He was determined to show me he was not a SMACK (term for nerd). He deliberately got an F once. I asked why and he said he wanted to prove he was normal. School bored him as it was not stimulating enough.

He became a professional diver for a while. He loved it. Good money long hours. He loves rock climbing. He loves to do Calculus and such math problems just as a hobby. How many people do that? He is is smart with money and excellent financial planner.



He now has 3 beautiful children. Two handsome boys(Jared and Gabriel) and our little princess (Mila). I am sure he smiles plenty at his family and wife Jeannene.

As a parent I am so proud that my little boy is such a good man. Even after the mountains he has climbed. He is grounded and loyal. I love you son...




POEM: Son

When you grow up what will you be
Where will you go and what will you see

If only one wish I wish for you
I wish you love your whole life through

From a boy to man you have grown
Through your journey you are not alone

My little boy my joy my heart
I miss you when we are apart

But looking back from where you have come
I am truly so proud of you son

5/30/07 My First Born

If you have had children you know how exciting it is to wait for your first. The one you have dreamed about,the one who you have planned for and imagined what they would look like.



I was a very young mother(not quite 18) but I wanted a baby, My prayers were answered March of 1968.
God gave me a little baby girl. She had a bump on her head ,lots of hair and because there were problems in the delivery and she was a forceps baby so she had a swollen face. I was sick all 9 months. I could not stand the smell of anything.But I loved McDonalds hamburgers. I woke every morning and ran to get fast food (reg hamburger with extra ketchup and mustard.)
Do not ask why but most of the time it assisted in helping morning sickness.

She came out screaming and the doctor said she had a great set of lungs. She was independent from day one. She did not like to be confined in anything. She hated the play pen, the stroller and high chair. So going out with her was a shore. She screamed bloody murder. She needed to be entertained all the time. She would not even take naps without me. Days and nights were mixed up. But all through all of this she grew up and turned into a wonderful ,independent, creative individual. I knew she would because of the strength she showed as a young person.
She puts on a tough exterior but she is my girl. My Shawny-what a beautiful person. She is my daughter and my friend and how lucky I am God gave her to me.
She married a wonderful guy Chris. They have been married for 20 years. They both know what they want and go for it. I wish I had more time with her but they have a family of their own. Two great boys (twins). Mathew and Jakob.
She is active with what they do and anything she can sign them up for. She is a strict parent but she is fair.
I am so proud of her. Not only what she will yet be but what she has become thru the years. She is a generous loving person . I love you daughter. You have been blessed. You are my hero.


Poem: A Daughter

My daughter is my reflection
How I love her from the time of inception

So small and tiny and she is looking at me
Does she know I love her and that she holds a key

As she looks into my eyes
Will she know the hows and whys

She is my daughter and I love her so
I whisper in her ear to let her know

A life without her just could not be
To my heart she holds the key

I will forever love you....daughter

5/22/07 The year of change

The year of change for me was 2003. I had reached a weight that was beyond reality for me. The doctor told me that if I did not loose the weight I would have a stroke or heart attack within a year. I was on medication for blood pressure,I had sugar issues and I was so swollen all the time. I had no energy and buying clothes that were attractive- FORGET IT. I was 336 pounds. I had spoke to my doctor over the years about the gastric bypass but she was reluctant to advise me, I tried all sorts of diets but I was not lucky.

Finally when things became worse for my health the doctor herself told me I should check out the gastric bypass. She by then had several patients that went thru it and had researched more about it.

So I decided to go for it. I ended up going to a hospital in Fresno California (5.50 hrs away) that specialized in this procedure. It never came to mind that 1 out of 3 people have complications or die. That did not even sink in. So off I went to do this radical procedure .They did it lapriscopically and it tool 2.5 hours for the procedure. I stayed in the hospital only two nights and was released on the 3rd day. I had no pain. I got up that night and walked. I had to be able to walk the hall 10 times up and back before they would release me. I know that part of this exercise was to prevent blood clots.

My first meal consisted of small can of Ensure in 1 oz cup full every 5 minutes. I had jello as well. I was not hungry. They by passed my stomach and intestines.
I spent the weekend in a hotel and my mother and I were taken there by limo. The hospital arranged all of this for us. Talk about being special. I went back to the office on Monday so doctor would release me. I was out of work 4 to 6 weeks. With instructions to walk,walk,walk. Eating was a problem later down the road. Some things I loved I can no longer eat. Either it makes me sick or does not agree with me. The worst things I experienced was throwing up. I do not do that much at all . Sometimes if I do not use my head.
I did not loose much hair like some people. The first 6 months are crucial and you loose most of your weight then. After that you must work at it and watch your eating. Absorbtion is an issue so I take multiple vitamins (Diff kinds) in triplicate.

I know weigh 182 lbs. I lost almost half of me. Those of you who know me are amazed. I am too.

I am 4 years out now . I went from a size 26 to size 14. I do not want to be any smaller. Do I recommend this...well I think I would. You have to be a certain kind of person. I remained positive. Now I do not take any medication. I have excellent cholesterol and no high blood pressure.

This last year I did a tummy tuck and hip-buttom (reduction-lift) 6 hours worth. I had a tough recovery from that but do not plan any other altering procedures. I still stare at myself. I have come along way.


Poem: TYPING

Typing is a great big bore

When I think I am done they give me more

One page, two,and even five

Don't they think that I am alive

Sores and blisters on my hands

But they still make more demands

I close my eyes - No it's no dream

One more line and I will scream

5/18/07 My Brother

My brothers name is Erik. He is six (6) years younger than I am. I was pretty tough on him when we were young as I did not want a brother. When my mother went to the hospital to have him my parents gave me a little dress and shoes to put in my closet and being little I took that as a promise for a sister. Well guess what.

I cried for three days and I still remember the feelings I had. My heart was broken. AS he grew up I did anything I could so he would fall or hurt himself. When I would leave for school in the mornings he would smile and wave like crazy. And me; well you can imagine. I stood there and stuck my tounge out and made faces. He would start to cry and I would laugh. EVIL I was.

We were not real close and I think it was the age difference. I left home early on and he grew up without me. Maybe that was a good thing. But, now we have a relationship. We are both older,have families and are both married to wonderful people. He gives me a bad time of all the things I did. I was so jealous.

He is a wonderful man. Not perfect but a good man. He calls to check on me and mom couple times a week. He has four children. One left to raise yet. Arianna is married, Nick is married, Kaira is going to college and Larisa is still in high school . His wife is an awesome person (Lori). She is kind and loving. I am blessed to have him as a brother and I love him. He lives in Idaho and I do not see him often but I miss him and think of him always.

If you read this brother you are important to me and I am sorry for all the faces I made at you.
Kisses to you.


Poem: New Life

You have given me a new life and hope that I can look forward to

I have picked myself up and turned my head and it is all because of you

The gift of love you've given me its worth more than all the gold

The future together is wide open and one we both can mold

I am convinced our union came from up above

So take my hand and I'll give to you all my heart and love

5/12/07 My Father

My dad was born In Dobelle Latvia. He came from a family that raised Arabian horses and they owned a large farm.

He left his family when he was 17 years old to go fight the war and become a soldier.

That was the last time his mother,father and siblings saw him . He never returned to his home land.

My father fought all over in Europe. He was a prisoner of war in Italy. He was shot in the temple , stomach and leg and survived. He experienced hunger, pain and loneliness.

He was a huge family man and loved my mother to death. He worshipped the ground she walked on (literally). Even though his health was not the best he found ways to support us.

He was a electrician by trade but for many years worked in the wood industry. He built beautiful furniture, cabinets and custom windows.

Even though he lived in America for a long time. His heart yearned for his family. Latvia became free again in 1991 but by then my fathers health was deteriorating.

He wanted to make a trip to walk on Latvian soil and hug his brother Erik, sisters Ilga and Gaida. There are currently about 18 family members in Latvia and his siblings are still alive. He was the oldest.

He was not there when his parents passed but they kept his memory alive. Even on his mothers death bed the cousins were told not to forget the family in America.

He spoke to them as much as he could and often sent medicines to his brother as it was hard to get good medical care at that time.

Even though he had my mother and me and my brother Erik he was sad inside. My mother did not show much interest in his family when he was alive and I think that really hurt. He saved all the letters and pictures.

My brother and I have turned all that around. We have joined together with the family in Latvia. It is like it has made us complete. We communicate with the family and share picture. My brother Erik has already gone 2 times to Latvia and this will be my 1st.

I know my father will make this journey with me and he knows how much I love his family and this has given me an extended family. I simply adore them.
In the younger days my dad smoked a pipe. I now have all his pipes. Every once and awhile I will be somewhere or just sitting quietly and I will smell cherry tobacco. I get a warm feeling. I know he is near. I miss him ............ He was a great dad and loving grandfather. He passed away from cancer in November 1994.


POEM: Dad

When I have needed he has been there
Running,doing and showing he cares

In the past when I was a little girl
He would fix my little curl

There is nothing bad I can ever say
He is special in every way

When all is lost and seems at an end
He is there to help defend

I love you with all my heart
In my life your always a part

YOU ARE MY DAD

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